cillathenomad

Why is it that when I'm happy (at least I try very hard) things happen and all my hopes just crash. I just got home from work and read something horrible, well not life threatening but happinness. Not mine, but someone very close and dear to me.... And I don't know what to do to help!!
God, I had felt so good this last weeks and now it feels like I can't breathe.
What about all those moments when this guy shows how much he cares about her and now suddenly, out of the blue he's with somebody else? What happened after A million love songs? Was it just bull?
Are all the guys like him? Should I rethink my decision about a certain person, just in case it happens again?

Let me tell you something about my past, I dated a guy when I was 14....he was then the love of my life (or so I thought). I was shy (just like now) and had no experience what so ever. Yeah my first boyfriend....well he was embarrassed of me while we were a coupple. He never showed any boyfriendly feelings while we were around other people and he never said he loved me....until I asked him. But of course he lied, for 1 1/2 years I lived the lie and when we finally broke up I felt a huge freedom. 4 days later he told the entire class that the only one in love in our relationship was me. He never loved me. It took me years to get over what he did to me, I was really scared and I still am...of finding someone special and that he would lie every single day.

Well, I think it's enough for today....I have to go and try to get some sleep.
Goodnight.